Friday, March 16, 2012

Denied

For those of you anxiously awaiting results of our DE consult this Monday, I am sorry to tell you that today I had to cancel our appointment - for the 3rd time :( I know, I know.

Without going into too many details, my husband's job has always been impossible to deal with when it comes to time off & they have not been flexible at all throughout this journey. My husband had asked for the day off back in Feb when we had to cancel the 2nd time but with it being "spring break" around here, there were too many employees already off so his request was denied. Yesterday he was told that his late arrival for Monday has been denied & they are no longer willing to let him come in after our appt - hence the reason for cancelling.

To say I am disappointed is an understatement.

To say I am feeling like this is never going to happen for us is a fact.

To say I am about ready to give up on our dream of becoming parents is dead on.

I just don't feel like I have any more "fight" or hope left in me. And honestly, I really wasn't all that surprised we had to cancel this appointment nor did I show much emotion when he told me he couldn't go. I think I am realizing that we are probably nearing the end of the road in this journey we call infertility & oddly enough, I am slowly coming to terms with it.

Our new appointment is now scheduled for Monday, April 23rd. They had an appt the 1st week of April available but it was in the afternoon & I knew the a-holes at Shane's job wouldn't let him off early. He is on vacation the entire last week of April so there should be no reason why we both can't make this appt.

Bear with me ladies for yet another 5 weeks....I too am anxiously awaiting!

3 comments:

Lauren said...

OMG, how incredibly upsetting. I would feel exactly as you do. I still have hope. big, huge, hugs

I can haz babyz? said...

I am so sorry! (((Huge hugs)))

Amanda said...

My heart just aches. I am sorry sorry there has been another delay, but please hold out hope. When the world is telling you 'no' or 'give up', hope is that quiet voice saying 'try one more time'. You better believe that you'll be showered with prayers and love like crazy in the next 5 weeks!!!